The News, The Gossip, The Views... Geoff Says
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Bouncy B(.)(.)BIES !
Blog 3. I mean, I cannot stand effing TV programmes that constantly show like all of the time, I mean showing women's wonderful wobbling bouncy boobies with the parting in the middle, I mean why show them continueously? WTF Darlings if you've gotten em why not flaunt em ffs? But, butts, why the hell not try focusing on their bums (with the larger than larger parting for farting in the middle ffs) (I mean wtf, the only reason we two that's Lou and me, we don't go out that much is that because my wife's arse is so large her…
Belly Tucks
Blog 4. Oh, and before I leave the chin and belly tucks subject further down like there is another subject on an entirely different matter in the pussy region of our lives TTFFTFFS (work that one out) and that is Designer Vagina's my darlings, they have even invented a kiss-back fairy-pussy, it keeps pursing out it's fairy lips man ffs and every now and then it's (stand back time) it starts blowing out wet kisses ffs, there is a lady from Camborne who has actually had a set of false teeth inserted into her fairy man ffs, on entry yer…
We are Real man !
Blog 5. Now then, on the other side of life, we real men, we are such a placid even-tempered peaceful home loving men, I mean, I know we can be a bit tyresome at times but only on rare occasions carn't we dears ffs? But, but, but ladies of the female variety fs we love you, all of you! Do we? ffs walobs that is, no it is not, but then, I am just playing to be on the grounds of myself like on both sides of the fence here for my own personal safety ffs? But then I, that's…
Johnson Boris (DH)
Blog 6. Formerly known as skidder the kidder a dishonest mess of an excuse for a man who likes to have his ferking picture in the papers every king day with his effing mugshot dressed up in some sort of high-visibilty jacket pretending to drive a tractor or he is dressed up in a cowboy image or a nurses uniform ffs the prick that he is so he is, but then that is disrespectful to pricks whether you can 'get it up' or not ffs (god, I am some stoned), and he the Partygate specialist aint he though, I mean,…
– The Life Guards –
Blog 7. Now then, as an ex HM The Life Guards soldier ( the Senior Regiment of the British Army) So, I was doing my 3 years National Service at Windsor from 1956, so did you know also that I have done my bit for Queen and Country, Oh yes indeedy for I were sent as a 'Secret Service agent' to sort out the Suez crisis alone, I was on the Empire Orwell ship on behalf of Number 10 Downing Street to negotiate a settlement, with the ladies of the nights provided, a few spliffs later getting pist out of…
– My (.)(.) Missus –
Blog 8. Now then, I am on the last 10 bales so if you think I am not concentrating when you speak to me, then you are right my lovers so, please don't talk any crap yiddish rubbish nor or any common sense to me cos I am constantly up there somewhere else man in an entirely different other fantasy type world where flowers grow inside out and rabbits have four ears and they recycle their pellet poos for kids between 4 and 15 years ffs for breakfast? so I will agree to anything you say so borrocks to the…
Adults Only !
Blog 9. By the way my men readers question from me to you! "Sir, do you have any pictures of your missus totally in the nude like, I mean like, totally in the buff? Your reply, "How rude, NO I have not FFS!" (ME) Would you like to buy some?? I have got several to chose from she is so lovely, time she shaved though ffs, or I do have pics of her with your mate from around the corner, like doing it man, like shagging away ffs, I mean all the lads has been there over the years mate,…
Car Boot Sales, The Beginning .
Blog 10. Car Boot Sales Now then, In a way at 84 years old I see the world of Car Boot Sales here in Gods Country the lovely CORNWALL as thoroughly decent people set about selling or buying crap (but there is a lot of money in crap if you know what you are doing) wheeling and dealing between themselves since 1989 when we first started Car Boots Cornwall the dealers and wankers (don't be rude about wankers Geffers we all do it, some under different guises of course master Bates) they were completely out of control of themselves! Step…
Buck House !
Blog 14. Now then, I mean, the turnout to Buck House for the Jubilee was impressive they say there were 20,000 I would have put the figure more like 50,000 but they were all celebrating so, where was the fun? where were the laughs coming from? I reckon that either myself (ex Butlins ex Pontins General Manager) (that's TRUE!!) or dear old Michael Barrymoor (give him a break ffs he was such a highly talented man (still is) who knew how to handle contestants and provide great-great fun and laughter and real entertainment) Now then, he or I could have…
Busk House Part II
Blog 15. Now then, the alleged Concert was full of has-beens never-has-beens and some guy who had the widest gob you have ever seen, if he was a lady he would be very much in demand dears? God, that is so rude of me, 3rd spliff in progress, or is it the fourth or fifth ffs I don't GAF? I only keep putting 'Now then' cos I know it annoys you, do I gaf? That'll be a no then sfoilya! Now then, Some of my readers have been so complimentary asking for more of my stories of confrontational stupidity rudeness…